The holiday season, especially Thanksgiving, is often painted as a time of joy and togetherness. But for many, it can be a source of significant stress, particularly when navigating unresolved family trauma. At Core Psychotherapy Center, we understand that these gatherings in Chicagoland and the surrounding areas can be incredibly activating. We believe in validating your experience and empowering you with strategies to protect your peace.
The Trauma of the Holidays: Managing Triggers and Finding Peace During Thanksgiving
Acknowledge and Validate Your Feelings
First, it is essential to validate your own emotions. Feeling anxious, angry, or wanting to withdraw is a normal response to past relational trauma. These feelings are not a sign of failure; they are your nervous system's way of signaling a potential threat. Acknowledging this reality is the first step toward managing it.
Proactively Set Boundaries for Safety
Boundaries are a crucial trauma therapy technique for self-preservation. This may mean limiting the time you spend at an event, deciding which topics are off-limits for discussion, or even choosing not to attend. A boundary is not an act of aggression; it is a clear and kind way to protect your emotional well-being.
Prepare In-the-Moment Grounding Techniques
When you feel a trigger activating, having a plan is critical. Simple grounding techniques can re-regulate your nervous system. Focus on your five senses: name five things you can see, four you can feel, three you can hear, two you can smell, and one you can taste. This pulls your mind back to the present moment.
Prioritize Self-Compassion Over Expectation
Release the pressure for a "perfect" holiday. It is okay if your Thanksgiving looks different from others. Prioritize self-compassion. This could mean scheduling time for yourself before and after the event, bringing a supportive friend, or having an exit strategy. Your peace is more important than anyone’s expectations of you.
Managing this time of year is a testament to your resilience. These strategies—validation, boundaries, grounding, and self-compassion—are all tools we explore in family trauma therapy. If you are in Chicagoland and feel you need more support, Core Psychotherapy Center is here. We encourage you to learn more about our approach to intensive trauma therapy or to schedule a consultation with our compassionate team.